Standing up for yourself

Public speaking is a sneaky beast. You think it’s about speaking but it's about more than that. It can challenge us to be really clear about our values (amongst other things). Questions need answering like: “Why am I saying this?”, “Who am I when I stand up?” and “How do I want to show up in life?”
The act of answering those questions can be really useful. For some people they can have a profound effect on their lives. “What’s important to me?" often comes up for people on my courses. Answering that question out loud, in front of people, is very different to just thinking about this in our heads. It has far more power. I think being clear about our values gives us a deeper level of confidence.

Of course, there is a vulnerability to pubilc speaking that just goes with the territory. You are going to be seen, you are going to be heard*. We need to be prepared to take the risk that people might disagree with us. Or, more strangely, be surprised to hear out loud what we say about ourselves.

Two years ago, a course participant discovered that she couldn’t stay with her company after she spoke about what was important to her. It wasn’t a question that she’d asked herself before. It turns out there wasn’t a close fit between what the company valued and what she did. All because she was preparing to do a speech (and the company was paying! - sorry boss). Sometimes speech preparation can produce awkward answers!

Great speakers are willing to accept uncomfortable feelings. It’s not the absence of fear but the focus on something else, something bigger than themselves that makes the difference. For example, being in service of an idea bigger than them, like being more focused on the purpose of the talk rather than their feelings. When you are thinking about “What really matters…..” magic can happen to you and to the audience.

 “Courage is not the absence of fear but the realization that there is something more important”.

Victor Frankl’s words beg a powerful question. What’s more important to YOU than fear?

*Before you get to this stage as a speaker, you may need to do some fundamental training on these skills and reframes (my course looks at these fundamental skills which you need first)